Teen Dating Violence: What Every Parent Needs to Know
“But Daddy, I love him!”
It’s a phrase many parents have heard sometimes jokingly, sometimes seriously, and sometimes in moments that leave families feeling confused, worried, and unsure of how to respond. For teenagers, first love can feel intense and all-consuming. Emotions are big, experiences are new, and relationships often feel like the center of their world.
But what happens when that relationship begins to cause harm instead of happiness?
Teen dating relationships should be a space where young people learn about respect, communication, and mutual support. Unfortunately, many teens find themselves in relationships marked by control, jealousy, pressure, and emotional manipulation. And because these behaviors are often mistaken for passion or commitment, teens may defend relationships that are actually hurting them.
Teen dating violence doesn’t always leave visible bruises. Often, it shows up as constant texting to monitor whereabouts, pressure to share passwords, guilt used to control decisions, isolation from friends, or emotional put-downs that chip away at confidence. In today’s digital world, abuse can follow teens everywhere through social media, group chats, and late-night messages demanding attention or compliance.
The effects can be long-lasting. Teens experiencing unhealthy relationships are more likely to struggle with anxiety, depression, changes in academic performance, and withdrawal from family and friends. Some begin to believe they deserve poor treatment or that controlling behavior is normal in relationships, shaping how they view love well into adulthood.
And many suffer in silence.
Teens may stay in unhealthy relationships because they fear losing someone they care about, worry that adults will forbid them from dating, feel embarrassed, or simply don’t recognize the warning signs. They may confuse jealousy with love or control with protection.
This is where parents and caregivers play a crucial role.
Red Flags Parents Should Watch For
Changes can sometimes be subtle. Warning signs may include:
• Sudden withdrawal from friends or family
• A partner who constantly checks their location or demands immediate responses
• Increased secrecy around phones or social media
• Mood swings, anxiety, or a drop in self-esteem
• Loss of interest in hobbies or activities they once enjoyed
• A partner showing extreme jealousy or possessiveness
• Frequent excuses made for a partner’s behavior
• Pressure to spend all their time with one person
One sign alone may not signal abuse, but patterns deserve attention.
Keeping the Door Open
When parents suspect something is wrong, the instinct is often to ban the relationship or demand it end immediately. But teens who feel judged or controlled may pull away and cling even tighter to unhealthy partners.
Instead, start conversations early about what healthy relationships look like respect, trust, independence, kindness, and boundaries. Ask questions. Listen. Share concerns calmly. Help teens understand they deserve relationships where they feel safe, valued, and supported.
And remind them often: love should never feel like fear, control, or isolation.
Because behind the words “But Daddy, I love him” is often a young person still learning what love truly means. And with support, guidance, and open communication, we can help teens build relationships that lift them up rather than tear them down.
Every young person deserves a love story rooted in respect, safety, and dignity.
#TeenDatingViolenceAwareness